


Recreant

by Celandine



Series: Dakin/Irwin [21]
Category: History Boys (2006)
Genre: Ficlet, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-04-13
Updated: 2008-04-13
Packaged: 2017-10-12 03:19:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/120205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celandine/pseuds/Celandine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dakin doesn't want to be present when Scripps interviews Irwin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recreant

Dakin doesn't want to talk about whether he should be there when Scripps comes to interview Irwin. On the one hand, it would be quite natural; his best mate from school, why shouldn't he welcome the chance to catch up, after all these years? On the other, the idea makes him more nervous than he wants to admit. Talking would only exacerbate the feeling.

Not-talking about it, though, means that all of his and Irwin's conversations in the intervening week resemble an iceberg, with far more under the surface than it would appear. He doesn't want Irwin to think that he's reluctant to be present because he's ashamed of their relationship. He isn't, not at all, even if he doesn't go out and announce to the world at large that he's in love with another man.

But Scripps knew him before. Of course there are others who did too, all the friends and colleagues from the past decade at least, many of whom showed greater or lesser degrees of startlement when they found out that Dakin wasn't the uncomplicated heterosexual they'd thought. But none of them had known Dakin when he was in school, when he first flirted with Irwin, when it was far more problematic.

On Saturday morning he removes the photographs of himself and Irwin from the piano. He hesitates over it, and finally leaves the one that Irwin gave him, with all of the history boys and their teachers. If Scripps sees that one, it won't matter, he supposes. He retreats to his study on the second storey to wait there until the end of the interview.

Maybe he'll reconsider, later. He tells himself that he doesn't want to distract Scripps, take away from his focus on Irwin, but the truth is that he is afraid that Scripps will judge him, will judge Irwin, thinking of him the way they all thought of Hector, back in school. There's another fear, too, but he won't acknowledge that one even to himself.

When it seems Scripps is gone, Dakin goes downstairs to ask Irwin if the interview went well. Irwin says that it did, but he looks tired, uncertain. Dakin touches him in apology and says that if Scripps needs to come again, for more pictures or whatever, next time he will stay.


End file.
